


Sacrificial Bride

by crimson_wake



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Arranged Marriage, Canon-Typical Violence, Dubious Consent, F/M, Forced Marriage, Forced Relationship, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-20
Updated: 2016-03-25
Packaged: 2018-04-05 09:38:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4174983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crimson_wake/pseuds/crimson_wake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You had been given to the Zoldyck family,what you deemed as a sacrifice, to marry their eldest son: Illumi Zoldyck.</p><p> </p><p>The reader (you) is 18 in this story.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The carriage you were being kept in was filled with a deadly silence. You felt as though one word from anyone, especially you, would fill the carriage with poisonous stares that would make anyone shrink in pure terror. Sitting to your right was your mother, the one who was practically giving you away as if you were a piece of property. In front of you was your father who hadn't even stopped your mother from setting this whole arrangement up. Your father always was so spineless, especially when it came to mother. She was always the one in charge of everyone with the disregard of anyone and everyone's feelings on the matter. Just like it was now. It had all begun 7 moons ago.

\--

"[Y/N]." Your mother had called out to be given your attention as she combed through your [H/L] [H/C] just as she did every night. It was a tradition of sorts, it had always seemed to put you at ease.

"Yes?" You replied, not particularly paying attention. 

"As my eldest daughter, your father and I think it's time you wed." She stated bluntly as she continued to comb through your hair. Your eyes widened in pure shock and you whipped your head around to face her with a confused, panicked look on your face. 

"What?!" You sputtered, finding the idea of getting married at your age so abhorrent. Your mother, however, did not as she kept her calm and cool composure. 

"Please, [Y/N]. We've already arranged a meeting with a potential husband and--" 

"A meeting?! You didn't even ask me for permission!" You barked as you cut her off, clearly enraged. 

"Yes. Either way you were going to say no. And I'd much rather beg for forgiveness you'll never give me than ask for permission you won't ever permit me." She replied as if it were rehearsed. Taking a seat next to you on your bed she put down the comb and wrapped a gentle arm around your back. "He's a respectable man and assassin, he does his job very well, he's 24 and--" 

"I don't want to marry some old, stranger!" You continued to protest but silenced immediately as your mother glared at you sharply. 

"You will go to this arrangement meeting, and you will be on your best behavior, [Y/N]. If you ruin this for you and the family I will personally disown you. You will be dead to me, do I make myself clear?" 

You blinked a few times in surprise and swallowed a lump in your throat as you croaked out a practically forced response, "Yes ma'am." 

As the days went on, coming closer and closer to the date to meet the Zoldycks for an arranged marriage meeting, you became more anxious and unstable. You weren't ready for marriage. Hell, you hadn't even had your first kiss yet. You couldn't believe your parents thought you were ready for an arranged marriage. Well, whether you were ready or not didn't particularly matter as both families simply needed possible heirs, and knowing your family they'd squeeze every Jenny out of the Zolydcks as much as humanly possible. 

\--

So there you were, practically trapped in a carriage with your so called parents riding your way up to Kukuroo Mountain. 

Upon arrival the carriage stopped, notifying those riding they had reached their destination. Your mother and father looked at one another and then hesitantly at you. Your mother reached for your hand and clasped it gently. 

"Remember [Y/N], you are a proud [L/N] ready to serve your family and intertwine with the Zoldycks. Make us proud and do not disappoint us." 

Your mother's advice sounded more like a threat then it did a pep talk. However, what she said was most true. You were proud to serve your family even if it meant marrying a stranger. 

Nodding to both of your parents you stepped out of the carriage and looked upon the the testing gate. Taking a deep breath you made your way forward and placed your hands against it. Closing your eyes you gave a a strong push with all of the strength you could muster and just barely opened the gate. On the other side was a girl in a suit with shaggy hair, tied in different angles and positions. She closed her eyes and bowed to you, you gave a courtesy in return. 

"Welcome Ms.[L/N] to the Zoldyck manner. My name is Canary and I will be guiding you." 

As you gave a quick nod in acknowledgement the girl who called herself Canary turned on her heel and began to walk towards the mansion, motioning for you to follow her. Looking back at the now closed testing gate you reluctantly follow the young female butler. 

\--

Upon arrival to the Zoldyck estate, Canary stopped in her tracks and motioned for you to enter the household. Gently biting your lip you nodded and thanked her, much to her surprise. Slowly but surely you entered the mansion of the greatly feared Zoldycks.

Almost immediately you were blinded by the bright lights of the glistening crystal chandeliers compared to the dim, misty morning your eyes had grown accustomed to earlier on your walk with Canary. You were greeted butler after butler, they could sense your nervous form but did nothing to try to ease it, simply pushing you into a room filled with the Zoldyck members. Trying your best to stay calm you sat down on your knees on the pillow in front of you. Bowing slightly you closed you eyes and introduced yourself, 

"Good morning Mr. And Mrs. Zoldyck. I am called [F/N] [L/N]. It is a most novel pleasure to meet your esteemed acquaintance." Sitting back up and straightening your posture you took a look at the two heads of the household. Silva had a certain amused look on his face, whether it was from you or an event prior you didn't know. His wife, Kikyou, was unreadable. 

As The rest of the Zoldyck family members introduced themselves all of them departed as their father each looked them in the eye after they gave their introduction. The room was left empty with only three remaining participants. 

Silva looked over to his wife as she pulled out a clipboard with several sheets of paper on them. Clicking a ball point pen a few times, she eventually spoke up, 

"So, [F/N], I'm going to ask a few questions, please answer clearly and honestly."

You nodded, "Yes ma'am."

"First question: What is your current age?"

"18, ma'am."

"Ah, you're only 6 years younger then my son. Could be worse, I suppose." She stated, almost bored as she jotted down a few things on her clipboard. "Second: Are you a virgin?"

Her second question almost made you sputter in utter confusion and embarrassment. "M-Ma'am?" 

"Zoldycks above all else value chastity and purity, no exceptions. It's a simple yes or no question."

Feeling your cheeks burn up you answered regardless, "Yes, I am." 

Kikyou nodded and jotted a few more things down. As time passes on Kikyou's questions became far more strange or what she appeared to see as "traditional". Nonetheless her questioning ceased and she suddenly snapped her fingers, signaling someone to enter the room. 

You waited a few moments but saw no one enter the room. Puzzled you turned your attention back to Kikyou. Before you could speak up someone else already did,

"You called, Mother?" 

You let out a small, inaudible squeak as you jumped slightly at the man suddenly sitting beside you. Blinking a few times you examined him. He was rather tall with long, black hair cascading down his back and shoulders. If you didn't know any better you might've mistaken him for a woman. However, he did have some masculine features to him such as his muscular build. 

"Illumi, dear, this is your wife-to-be, [Y/N]." Kikyou seemed pleased with herself. It had appeared she deemed you worthy of her son. 

"Wife-to-be?" Illumi questioned and turned to you, examining you as you did to him moments before. He closed his eyes for a moment before nodding, "Alright. I understand."

Suddenly dread had begun to pool into your stomach, becoming aware of what had just happened. 

You were engaged.

Before long Illumi's mother had been going on and on about a wedding. Or rather, YOUR wedding. 

It all felt like a dream. 

As if none of it were real. 

It was happening too fast, you couldn't take it. 

Suddenly feeling dizzy you tried to stand up to excuse yourself but it seemed you lost your balance as you fell into unconsciousness. For some reason you felt something soft as you heard Kikyou exclaim in surprise to you collapsing. 

And then everything went black. 

And then silence.

Nothing.


	2. Chapter 2

As you opened your eyes you almost instantly felt a different pair on you. Looking lazily to your left you saw no one, but to your right was Illumi sitting in a chair beside the bed you were laying on. 

Wait a minute.

Bed? 

Looking down at the soft, comfortable mattress you noticed how it differentiated from yours. Such as the bedding, the way it stood off the floor, and the beautiful wooden pillars that would suggest it was a canopy bed. Or a "princess bed" as you liked to call it. The curtains were pulled back, which was odd considering it felt as though it was time for sleep or at least an evening nap at the least, which would mean they'd be drawn close for the one occupying the bed: you. 

Sitting up you met Illumi's blatant stare with one of your own, filled with confusion. Taking this as a sign to initiate things he sat up from his chair and made his way over to the bed. Looming over you he placed a hand beside you and the other cupping your cheek, which you would have found affectionate had his hands and eyes not seem so cold and uninviting. 

"How are you feeling?" He asked, scanning your face for any hints to answer the question for him. 

"I-I'm alright. Ah, I must go apologize to Mrs. Zoldyck for my rudeness earlier..." You stated putting a hand on his firm, hard chest as you attempted to push him away. Without much effort he stepped back, allowing you to pull yourself off the bed. 

Almost near instant your vision became somewhat double visioned and slightly hazy within each step you took to the door. Reaching out for the wall to support you, you nearly toppled over and collapsed again. Once more you feel that same soft feeling just before you had passed out earlier. You felt two strong arms around you, one holding you by the waist and the other resting on your midback. You looked up at Illumi, the one who appeared to be holding you up. He examined your form for a few moments before he spoke up,

"Stay and rest. You collapsed most likely from a feeling of being overwhelmed, or anxiety in short. If you push yourself you'll get a fever, and that would certainly upset Mother." He stated sounding as though he were bored. 

Feeling the heat rise to your cheeks, you looked away in shame. Biting your lip lightly as you let out a surprised gasp when Illumi suddenly picked you up bridal style and gently placed you back on to the "princess bed". Clearing your throat quietly you looked him in the eye and tried your best to introduce yourself, 

"I am called [F/N] [L/N], it's a pleasure to meet you. I look forward to our time together." You gave a soft, warm smile at the man. After a few moments of silence he simply nodded. He didn't seem all that impressed with your introduction, not that you were expecting him to.

Laying down on your side you hitched one of your knees up to your stomach to get into a comfortable position as you watched Illumi take his place back into his chair, watching you closely just as he did before. Blinking a few times your curiosity go the better of you and you had asked for the current time, telling him it felt late.

"Late evening." He responded without hesitation. Sitting back up again you looked at him with wide eyes. You were clearly appalled at how late it was, not to mention you had simply slept the day away so rudely! 

Illumi watched you as you struggled to process this piece of information. Looking back at him who showed no signs of emotion you just huffed and lied back down on the bed, curling into the positions you were in before you sat up. 

"If it's so late then I feel awful for taking up your bed..." You mumbled against a pillow. The raven haired man seemed to think about this for a few moments before suddenly standing up. 

"Okay." Was all he said as he walked over to his dresser and pulled out pajama pants. Laying the article of clothing on the bed he began to undress, pulling his shirt off his frame first. Blushing furiously at the sight you immediately looked away and closed your eyes tightly. Noticing this Illumi left the room and returned with a white nightgown that appeared to belong to a child. Looking at it skeptically you raised an eyebrow at him. Without saying a word he gently tossed it to you, implying for you to change into it. Biting your lip you nodded at him and stood up and strode over to the bathroom to change. 

Upon entering the bathroom you gently closed and locked the door behind you. The bathroom was, not so surprisingly, rather large and grand. It fit for his large bedroom to match. The bathroom, however, was almost all white, right from the marble floors to the high ceiling. It was certainly meant for a Zoldyck. 

Sighing you began to strip off your clothes and toss them into a nearby laundry basket as you pulled on the nightgown. Taking a deep breath in it was just as you had suspected it to be: a tad small. Perhaps it really did belong to a child? As far as you knew there were some feminine children in the room where you introduced yourself to all of the Zoldyck house hold members. Blushing slightly in the mirror as the fabric didn't quite cling to you but didn't exactly hang loose either, you turned a few times to make sure you put it on correctly. Finding you did you stepped out of the bathroom and back into the bedroom. Illumi had already taken his place on the opposite side from where you were laying as the curtains on his side of the bed were drawn close. 

Awkwardly you turned off the lights and crawled back in the bed, trying to create as much space as possible between the two of your backs. You blinked every now and again in thought, despite the pitch blackness of the room. You began to think of your father and mother, how they practically forced you into this marriage for their selfish reasons. However despite it all you already missed them. And your siblings, your manor, the servants; everything. Why did you have to be a sacrifice? Why? Tears filled your eyes as you allowed them to fall down your cheeks, paying no mind to them you lay awake, staring at the ceiling. You couldn't see anything of course but you did it anyway. 

Several hours passed and as you were sure Illumi, your oh-so-lovely-husband-to-be was asleep. Carefully you slipped out of bed and darted out of the room as quickly as possible. You ran down the halls as quickly and quietly as you could, your [H/ L] flowing behind you as you ran. 

Upon seeing a room filled with several Windows you decided to enter it, curiosity getting the better of you as you didn't see many Windows in the hallways. As you entered the room you came to the conclusion it was somewhat similar to a sun room. You cautiously stride over to one of the Windows and leaned against the ledge, peering out into the darkness. You aimlessly looked out through the Windows for a while, somehow it was....calming. Far more so than Illumi's room on anywhere else in the mansion. You felt like you were suffocating and it was unbearable. 

"Here isn't where I want to be..." You absent mindedly thought to yourself. For a moment you genuinely thought about escaping. But where would you go? How would you leave? You were on a mountain for God's sake! Still, you couldn't help but think about it.

Suddenly someone yanked your wrist from behind and threw you over their shoulder. Seeing straight black hair in the moonlight you could only assume it was Illumi. Did he leave to hunt you down? Your thoughts on escaping dwindled bit by bit as he held onto you firmly. 

"Don't run off." Was all he said as he yawned silently and carried you back to his - or rather you room as well. The thought made you shiver. You didn't dare disobey him or struggle out of fear of what he would do. He was a highly trained assassin after all, far greater than your family could compare. 

Silently you watched the tiles pass on the floor as Illumi carried you to your now shared room. You wondered if he was angry? Not wanting to push your luck all in one night you decided to stay silent and keep your eyes glued to the floor as you continued watching tiles come in and out of your field of vision. 

By the time you arrived back to the room Illumi lazily opened and shut the door behind him as he threw you gently onto the bed. You let out a quiet squeak at his sudden movements. You watched him carefully as he climbed onto the bed, hovering over you as if he were threatening you. Holding your breath you watched his movements as you internally panicked, trying to remain calm(which was far more difficult than it had ever been) His hand found its way to your waist and he rubbed small circles against the fabric with his thumb. Slowly he wrapped his arm around your waist and plopped down next to you, tugging you close to his bare chest. 

This felt wrong. 

It all felt so, so wrong. 

You wanted to go home, to see your father and mother again. 

You wanted your mother to comb through your hair before you went to sleep. 

But she couldn't do that and you couldn't ask anyone to. 

Because you were a sacrifice after all. 

You cried yourself to sleep that night as your fiancee held onto you tightly, refusing to let you go, even is his sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, suggestions are totally welcome, just say what you want and bam I gotchu


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut and typos ahoy

By the time you woke up you heard birds chirping from outside. You rubbed your red, swollen eyes from crying last night. Suddenly you felt Illumi's breath on the back of your neck and you gasped. Tensing up you suddenly became aware of his body pressing up against yours with a tight grip around your waist. Fervently looking around the room in a state of panic you suddenly noticed the state of your nightgown: hitched up and threatening to fold past your thighs. Blushing maddeningly you tried to sit up and escape but as you made an attempt you felt Illumi pull on your arm and pull you back down against him. This time, however, facing him with your face buried into his chest along with his leg snaked between your own. You blushed slightly as you closed your eyes, listening to his steady heart beat.

"Oh...he smells nice..." You thought subconsciously as he continued to nuzzle your neck. Though it tickled slightly it was bearable, embarrassing to say the least but bearable.

Nearly half an hour passes and Illumi has yet to let you go and you let out a frustrated sigh. Seemingly out of the blue he began to hold you a bit tighter than would could be deemed comfortable.

"T-That hurts..." You croaked out, trying to wake him up so he'd let go of you. Though the complete opposite happened and he only seemed to squeeze you tighter. You let out a yelp, startling him awake. You pushed yourself away from him gasping and panting as you tried to catch your breath since he was just squeezing the air out of your lungs. Illumi sat up and cocked his head to the side, confused.

Shrugging it off Illumi gently took your chin in his hand and turned your head so you'd be facing him as he gently placed a kiss on your forehead.

"Good morning." The Young man greeted you as if it were nothing. Well, maybe it was nothing and you were just making a big deal out of it with the heat rising to your cheeks as you sputtered and fumbled over your words in embarrassment. Illumi furrowed his brows in confusion at your embarrassment. They were getting married soon and would have to do far more embarrassing things such as sex to produce children. But he kept that to himself not wanting to overwhelm you.

You watched him sit up and stretch, making his way to the bathroom and suddenly stopped in his tracks and turned to you with a request,

"I am taking a shower. Would you like to join me?" While you found the question itself absolutely ridiculous you couldn't help but find his attitude towards you seemingly uncharacteristic despite not knowing much about him. Nearly choking on your saliva you violently shook your head and buried your face into your hands finding it harder and harder to hide how easily embarrassed you got. Shrugging Illumi blinked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

You pressed your hand against your chest, trying to calm down your heart in fear it might burst. Taking in slow deep breaths you began to recollect your composure. You sighed before taking a look around the room as you didn't particularly have a good chance to. Something odd caught your eye: a torn outfit riddled with blood stains. Blinking a few times you cautiously made your way over to it, checking the bathroom door ever now and again. Picking up the fabric you wondered why it hadn't been thrown away yet. Perhaps he had some sort of emotional attachment to it? You smiled soft to yourself, making a strategy in your mind to clean and sew it back together.

Without warning the bathroom door swung open startling you as you dropped the fabric where it had lay before. You noticed he didn't have a shirt on and quickly looked away, taking account that he was more than likely fully naked. Illumi seemed to notice your discomfort and he strode over to you, wondering if you felt overwhelmed or ill. The raven haired man gently took your hand into his, gaining your attention.

You tried your best to keep your eyes on strictly his face until he spoke up,

"Are you ill?" He questioned, tilting his head to the side to examine you at a different angle.

"P-P..."

"What?"

"Put some c-clothes on!" You clenched your eyes shut as you yelled at him. You honestly didn't know how much more you could take of this. How could your parents expect you to spend the rest of your life with this oblivious fool?

"Oh." Illumi let go of you and stepped back a bit. You quickly averted your eyes and covered your face with your hands again until he had at least slacks on. Rubbing your cheek awkwardly you tried to muster out an apology,

"S-Sorry for yelling at you, I've never see a boy....n-n-naked..." You looked down and began to twiddle with your fingers in anticipation for his response. He was quiet for a few moments, an awkward silence filling the room.

"Don't worry about it." He shrugged and grabbed a towel before sitting down onto the bed to dry his long, wet hair. Crawling onto the bed and behind him you took the towel from his hands.

"May I?" You asked cautiously, you felt it was the least you could do after being so hard on him. He simply hummed in response allowing you to go ahead. Smiling a bit you began to dry his hair, gently massaging his scalp as you did so. Slowly tossing the towel to the side once you deemed his hair dry enough you took a comb from the nightstand and carefully began combing his hair much to his surprise. Absent mindedly you began humming as you worked the comb through his long, silky hair. Once you were finished you didn't want to stop.

"May I braid it?" You asked, not wanting to do anything to his hair without permission. Once again he just hummed allowing you access once more. Grinning to yourself you parted his hair into 3 sections and began to loop them under and above one another, successfully making a French braid.

Leaning on your side to reach the nightstand you quickly grabbed a nearby hand mirror and showed him the braid. His face was void of emotion and expressionless. You felt a little let down at his reaction.

"Thank you," Illumi tilted his head back so his face was in front of yours. "[F/N]."

And suddenly your lips felt warm.

 _'Huh? What's this sensation? Is he kissing me?'_ Your thoughts pass through your mind in a hurry, _'It feels weird...'_

Slightly shocked you closed your eyes as he placed a hand on the back of your head to deepen the kiss. You let out an involuntary gasp as you felt his tongue run across your lower lip. As you parted your lips to gasp he ceased the moment and slipped his tongue into your mouth. Feeling as though you were losing all strength in your body you made an attempt to pull away but Illumi quickly cupped your cheeks the moment your lips parted and he came back for more, kissing you passionately. As every second passed by it felt as though it was becoming harder and harder for you to resist.

Your mind had become hazy and clouded.

Your body lost all its strength and you had a difficult time resisting and putting up a fight.

Illumi slowly guided your body down to the bed as he begun to climb on top of you. Suddenly he pulled back to get a good look at you. The man noticed how breathless you were, blinking a few times he wondered if you never thought to breathe through your nose rather than suffocate from oxygen deprivation. But before he had time to continue thinking on it a knock came to his door,

"Master Illumi, Mistress [F/N]. Breakfast is ready, the rest of the family is waiting. At the orders of Lady Kikyou I've prepared clothes for [F/N]."

The voice was familiar to you, you were sure you'd heard it somewhere before. If it was a butler then you probably had no chance of recognizing it as the Zoldyck manor had far more many than you ever did.

Illumi paused for a few moments before climbing off of you and took long strides towards the door. You saw him open the door and receive folded clothes, obviously for you. Sitting up you brushed yourself off despite not having anything dirty on you. Illumi shut the door and walked back over to you and handed you the folded clothes.

"Wear these."

You nodded but Found yourself unable to meet his gaze and look him in the eye. You took the clothing and headed to the bathroom to change.

You slowly slipped off the nightgown and changed into what looked like a traditional Kimono, you had to admit it was quite beautiful.

Stepping out of the bathroom you nodded to Illumi who was finishing putting on a shirt with strange yellow pins in them that anyone would mistake for thick buttons.

As you both left his room and walked in silence to the dining room you had hoped none of them would notice how red your face was.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--6anoJOZ4JU/UdalqLVSOoI/AAAAAAAAAt8/GjWY2qQmyeo/s813/425p1.jpg
> 
> This is the Kimono you're wearing

"I'm home." Illumi announced as he entered his home despite knowing full well that his family would not respond nor welcome him back. Not that he particularly minded as that would involve kindness and some sort of deep emotional attachment which was unnecessary for elite assassins such as the Zoldycks. Illumi sighed as he ran a hand through his blood matted hair. His latest target put up quite a struggle, nothing he couldn't handle but it certainly did make his target's death far more painful and messy than it needed to be. As inconvenient as it was he was used to returning home covered in blood. 

Though he desired to go to his room and rest the fact that Gotoh was waiting for him patiently concluded that he would be unable to as soon as he had wished. Gotoh greeted his young master with a slight nod and began walking, implying for him to follow his lead. 

As soon as Gotoh had lead Illumi to his father's chambers did he give him a courteous bow, taking his leave directly after. Without thinking too much about it the young assassin entered his father's chambers and took a seat when he met his father's expectant gaze. 

Silva cleared his throat, rubbing his chin a bit as he finally spoke, "Illumi." 

"Yes, father?" 

Several minutes of silence befell the two men, neither speaking not breaking eye contact. Illumi was used to his father's typical silence, generally he was collecting his thoughts on something or analysing the person before him. 

"As a Zoldyck you were born into a prideful family. And I raised you to be an elite assassin like your mother and I and you did the same for your siblings." He began, though to Illumi it didn't seem like that was what his father wanted to address to him. "I suppose I'll be outright with it. As my eldest son, your mother and I think it's time you married and bear children for the Zoldyck pride and blood lines to continue with strong, plentiful members." 

This was no surprise to Illumi, though anyone could have guessed as he started at his father blankly. Illumi had been expecting this conversation ever since he first turned 16. He was only shocked it wasn't his mother telling him this rather than his father. 

"I understand." Illumi nodded ever so slightly. Silva chuckled a bit under his breath. 

"It's good to hear that. I expected as much from you, Illumi. Your mother has already taken the liberty of setting up an arrangement for a potential bride next week - though she seems confident that it will be the only one necessary." 

"I see. I will be prepared for it." 

"I don't doubt it. Son, you do know how to bed a woman, yes?" Silva cocked his eyebrow at his son questioningly. While he did in fantasize Illumi he always was one to surprise him from time to time. Not to mention he's never seen his son remotely interested in anyone whether romantic or sexual. 

"I enter myself inside of her on the wedding night until I ejaculate and 9 months later she will bear a healthy child." Illumi responded as if reciting from a passage of text he memorized long ago. 

The elder assassin let out a grunt in response. "Well, you're not wrong. But if that's all you have in mind for your wife I'm afraid you won't be able to successfully impregnate her on your wedding night."

Illumi tilted his head to the side, confused and demanding an explanation. 

"If you enter right off the bat you'll hurt her beyond belief. Not only that but she needs to be lubricated so her womb can accept your seed properly to create a child. Do you know how to do that?" 

Illumi thought for a few moments before answering, "No." 

"Then I'll explain," Silva grinned at his son and spoke up again, "You have to touch her, pleasure your wonderful wife-to-be, son. Caress her erogenous areas - which I'm sure you're aware which ones on the female body, yes?" Illumi nodded and Silva continued his speech, "You must make sure her natural lubricant is fairly clear and plentiful as it is most fertile. At that point all that is needed is your seed. Understand?"

"I understand." 

"Good. You're dismissed." 

Illumi nodded and bowed to his father before leaving, heading to his room. He looked down at his body that was cloaked in dried blood. He sighed at the state of his clothes as he slipped them off and stepped into the shower. Watching the blood from his body and hair spill and coil down the drain Illumi closed his eyes as the steam made him particularly drowsy. 

\--

You fidget awkwardly in your chair at the dining room table as Lady Kikyou go on and on about your wedding. If you didn't know any better you would have assumed she was more ecstatic about your wedding than you were. Illumi nodded as he ate his breakfast, carefully listening to his mother's words. 

"I was thinking something traditional, what are your thoughts dear?" Kikyou looked over to you. You jolted slightly and swallowed a lump in your throat since you weren't really following the conversation. 

"O-Oh...umm....well I..." You sputtered out nervously, looking around the room trying to distract yourself. It was then that you noticed a chair was empty at the dining table. You looked around the table to see who was missing. Kikyou was the first to come to the realization that Killua wasn't at the table and she huffed. 

"Kil really should show up for his meals with his family I mean we're all he has! Honestly, I should go look for him now!"

Suddenly an idea popped into your head. "U-Um! I can look for him! Really, it's no trouble!" You stood up, brushing your hands against your kimono. 

"There's no need, dear. I can just send one of the butlers for him--"

"Please! Er, I mean I'd just really like to find him myself...so we could eat....As a family." You somehow managed to lie through your teeth through a barely coherent sentence. You honestly just wanted to leave and be alone as soon as possible. Kikyou let out a boisterous laugh and allowed you to be dismissed. You bowed to her and quickly left the dining room in search of Killua. 

It was simple, if you found him, which was unlikely, simply stall as long as you could. And if you didn't it wouldn't exactly your fault since he WAS a well trained assassin. It was a simple plan to just get away. What could go wrong? 

Wandering around the large mansion you finally take a good look around the estate. You had to admit the architecture was brilliant and well built. You traced you fingers across the walls as you walked, getting a feel of the smooth texture across your skin. 

Walking down a familiar hallway you almost immediately recognized the entrance to the sun room. Smiling softly to yourself you looked behind you to make sure none of the butler's were watching you. Not seeing a single soul your smile grew wider and you braced yourself as you entered the sun room. You let out a slow, gentle exhale as you closed your eyes. Despite the sun just barely resting over the horizon the light still leaked through the Windows and brightened the room in the early dawn of the day. Kicking off your zori*, you climbed up onto the windowsill, pulling your knees up to your chest as you gazed outside the window; taking in the breathtaking view. 

Your heart stopped for a moment when you saw a bush of snow white hair kneeling down by the pond below. You didn't actually expect to find to Killua. Though now that you had you suppose you should bring him back. You took a deep breath and hesitantly knocked onto the window a few times to gain his attention. You watched him look around him, clearly confused. You couldn't help but giggle a bit at his confusion before knocking a few more times to alert him that the sound came from above. No sooner did your eyes meet and the both of you froze, just staring at one another. He simply smirked smugly and shoved his hands in his pockets. 

Smiling a bit in return you moved to open the latch on the window to call out to him and tell him to go to the dining room. However, you struggled to open the latch to the window and became frustrated rather quickly. Hitting it out of irritation the latch unlocked and the window swung open. 

Your eyes widened as your body effortlessly descended from the window head first. You didn't make a single sound nor did you attempt to move. You saw the pond come closer and closer as you fell further and further down as you clenched your eyes shut, ready for the impact of the water. 

And suddenly everything was cold and dark. 

You opened your mouth but nothing but bubbles came out into the cold pond. 

Deeper and deeper you could feel yourself drifting. 

Hesitantly you opened your eyes and you saw Killua standing over the pound. Without thinking you outstretched your hand thinking if you tried hard enough you could reach him. Darkness began to crowd your vision as you slowly began to loose oxygen. Slowly you closed your eyes once more as you allowed the weight of the heavy kimono slowly drag you down. 

And then...

You felt something tug on your wrist. Or rather, someone. They wrapped their arm around your waist and pulled you close to your chest as they began to swim up at an alarming speed. 

The moment you reached for the surface you gasped desperately for air but began violently coughing up the water from your lungs soon after. Then suddenly you felt like you were resting on the grass. Taking a risk, you opened your eyes as your lungs began to calm down now that it had its much needed oxygen. You saw the sky and the many tree tops. Sitting up you wiped your eyes and saw Killua shaking his head to be rid the water in his soaked scalp. Blinking a few times you looked at him and back at the pond, whispering "oh" as you made the connection. He looked back at you and burst out laughing, you blinked a few more times as you were confused at what was so funny. 

"You just fell out a window! What awful luck!" He snickered. Thinking on it, it was rather ridiculous and you ended up laughing along side him. "You're lucky Napoleon didn't eat you."

"Napoleon?" You questioned, wringing your hair. 

"Yep." He concluded, pointing to the pond. Peeping inside the pond you saw a rather large Koi fish. Confused, you furrowed your brows and look back at him for explanation to which he did not provide. 

"Koi fish don't eat people!" 

Killua blinked a few times as if this was a surprise to him. "They don't?" 

"No!"

"Huh. Oh well then I guess you kind of are lucky then."

"More like misinformation." 

Killua rolled his eyes and grinned. "Why'd you fall out the window anyway?"

You blushed a bit; full of shame as looked down, fiddling with your fingers. "I was trying to get your attention because you're needed in the dining room for breakfast with your family." 

The white haired assassin groaned and shoved his hand back in his pockets. "Yeah whatever, just let me feed Napoleon." Rustling in his pocket he pulled out a tin of fish food. As he kneeled down by the pond the Koi fish immediately swam up to the surface near Killua as he opened the tin full of fish food. You observed for a few moments before deciding to kneel down next to him and watch. 

"I think....that fish is fond of you, young master Killua." You noted softly. 

"Fond?" He questioned, continuing to feed the fish. 

You nodded and continued, "Yes. Maybe because it's the only creature in such a large body of water? The poor thing. But when young master Killua is here it seems happy, I suppose?" 

Killua thought about this for a moment before shrugging. "Maybe, and don't call me 'young master'. Killua is just fine." Sighing he stood up and dusted his hands of fish flakes stuck to his palm. Slowly you stood up with him.

"Please join us in the dining room." 

"With the both of us wet?" As soon as he mentioned that you shivered and he snickered. He shoved his hands back in his pockets and waved goodbye. 

"Wait! Young m--" 

"Just Killua." He cut you off as he grinned at you from over his shoulder. Letting out an irritated sigh you spoke again, 

"Killua, after we change our clothes will you join us in the dining room?"

"If I feel like it." He replied nonchalantly before disappearing in the blink of an eye. 

"Wha--" You rubbed your temples, sighing. Looking down at your wet clothes you trudged to enter the mansion once more so you could change out of your clothes so you wouldn't catch a cold. As you walked away a pair of black, void eyes bore into you. 

There in the sunroom stood Illumi watching you walk away as he clutched his braid between his fingers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Zori are those traditional japanese sandals worn with kimonos


	5. Chapter 5

Sneaking you way back into the mansion you spotted familiar face: Canary. Calling out to her she turned her attention to you and her eyes went as wide as saucers in shock at your state of appearance. You stayed in the same spot as she came running over to you as to not drip water all around the manor and cause a hassle for the butlers. 

“Lady [L/N]! What on Earth happened? Are you alright?” She asked question after question in a state of panic while inspecting your form to make sure you weren’t hurt in any way. 

“I…” You had begun but soon paused as you realized how you planned to explain the situation without sounding absolutely irrational or out of your mind. Or possibly both if worse had come to worse. “...fell in the pond when I was searching for Young Master Killua. I wasn’t paying much attention to my surroundings.”

Canary nodded at last when she found no harm done to your body. “I see, well at any point we need to get you out of those clothes, Lady [L/N].” She concluded and took your hand leading you back to your shared room with Illumi. “Wait here. I shall fetch you some clothes.” 

Before she left you made a point to speak up and clarify a few things, “Canary! Can you...er, please get me something less heavy, please?” Canary blinked a few times and nodded before walking off. 

Before long Canary returned and handed you several articles of clothing and you graciously accepted and thanked her. Slipping off your sopping wet Kimono you grabbed a towel and quickly dried your [H/L] hair and body. Pulling the new clothes Canary handed you onto your petite frame you gave one last look in the mirror before leaving the room, allowing Canary to take up your wet Kimono. 

Waving goodbye you headed back to the dining room to find everyone was still eating and conversing with one another as if nothing had been wrong. The first thing to catch your eye was Killua sitting at the table as well as he glared at his plate of food as you heard Kikyou scold and lecture Killua about attending meals with his family. 

Slowly you sat back down in your seat by Illumi and fidgeted a bit awkwardly. You didn’t even have to look at him to know he was staring at you intently and it intimidated the living hell out of you and you were certain he was aware of it. 

“What happened to you clothes, [F/N]?” He questioned, cocking his head to the side. Although he already knew the answer to it he felt compelled to ask since you were unaware of his presence. You stiffened a bit at his question and thought if you should lie about it or tell him the absolute truth. Deciding it would be an ill decision to lie to your Fiance you bit your lip nervously before speaking up, 

“I fell into...the pond when I was looking for Young Master Killua. So I had to change…” You whispered to him silently. As expected he didn’t show any signs of emotion or concern for you well being. 

“I see. Then is there also a reason why you’re wearing that instead of a different Kimono?” 

If you didn’t know any better you would have thought he sounded miffed, in a sense. “I wanted something lighter.” You explained as you fumbled with your fingers, trying to distract yourself by how intimidated you were. Illumi was silent for a few moments before he spoke up once more, 

“You look beautiful,” He said monotonously though you would be lying if you weren’t even a little bit flattered. “But I think you look more beautiful in traditional clothing.” You practically felt your heart drop to the pits of your stomach and stared down at your lap as you felt discouraged. Though you felt it was pointless to feel that way as it was intended to be a compliment. 

“It’s good to be comfortable though, right? Besides with such heavy clothing anyone would fall really easily.” You tore your attention from your lap and to the person speaking up for you: Killua. You smiled meekly and he winked at you, signaling he wouldn’t let even his brother subtly insult you; intentionally or not. “Shouldn’t you be more concerned for her well being, big bro?” He asked mockingly. You bit your lip slightly as you felt slightly both embarrassed and unnerved for someone as arrogant as Killua stand up for you. Noticing your behavior Killua snickers to himself silently. 

“Of course her well being is important, Kil. She is going to be my wife after all.” The raven haired man announced as if it was really news to anyone. Killua rolled his eyes and sneered at his elder brother as he grumbled to himself, practically stabbing his breakfast with his fork as he ate quietly. Kikyou cleared her throat in her attempt to break the silence and tension in the air.

“In an case thank you for bringing Kil to breakfast, [F/N].” 

You nodded and smiled a bit at her. It felt strange hearing praise from such an elite assassin yet you couldn’t help but feel somewhat glad for the praise itself. 

Suddenly a butler, whom you didn’t recognize, entered the room and approached Illumi as he discreetly whispered something into his ear. With a slight nod from Illumi he stood up and excused himself as he exited the room along with the butler. You heard Kikyou sigh and you turned your attention to her. 

“Another mission? And so early in the morning at that. While everyone is so proud of how successful he is I do hope he takes some time away for you, [F/N].” 

You shook your head frantically, “It’s really no trouble , ma’am. I think it’s good to continue to serve and contribute to the Zoldyck name.” Kikyou laughed silently before she spoke, 

“You’re such a respectful girl. I’m glad you’re part of our family now.” 

You bit your lip and nodded , suddenly feeling overwhelmed. Killua seemed to take notice to it but chose to ignore it as he finished off his breakfast. As everyone slowly began to finish off their food one by one you deemed it appropriate enough to take your leave. Just as you were about to exit the dining room you felt someone tug onto the back of your neckline. Letting out a silent squeak you turned around and saw Killua with a smug look on his face. 

“Come with me.” He ordered and turned on his heels as he began to walk down an unfamiliar hall to you. Hesitantly you followed him to what looked like a laundry room. You raised your eyebrow at him, confused. Without saying anything or providing an explanation he practically shoved a basket of wet clothes into your arms. You took a peek inside and recognized it to be your wet kimono among other articles of clothing to which you assumed were Killua’s. “Clean up your mess.” He smirked and stuck his tongue out at you. 

You mouth gaped open at his demand. “I can’t believe I thought you were nice!”

“Then that’s your fault for thinking that.” He grinned as he roughly ruffled your hair on his way out of the laundry room. You puffed your cheeks out as you pouted to yourself, finding the whole situation entirely unfair. 

Letting out an irritated sigh you rolled up your sleeves as you got to work hand washing your and Killua’s clothes. You just couldn’t believe he would decide to pick on you just out of the blue. And just when you were properly acquainted too! You continued to grumble to yourself about the whole situation as you collected the now clean clothing into a separate basket, heading outside to hang them up to dry. Wringing out the clothing you began to hung each and every separate article of clothing up. 

\--

Several hours had passed since you hung up the clothing and you had decided it was about time to bring it in. Pulling each and every piece of fabric down from the line you folded each and every article carefully and neatly. As you collected all of your things you headed back inside the manor, asking a nearby butler to hand Killua his clothes. 

Feeling exhausted you headed back to Illumi’s room and found a larger folded nightgown on the bed. Smiling a bit to yourself you stripped off your clothes and changed into the nightgown, appreciating the longer length and how it loosely hung from your body opposed to the previous one that clung tightly to you to the point where it was difficult to breathe. You were very grateful for the change. 

Seeing the sun set through a nearby window you ceased the moment and grabbed the comforter from the bed and wrapped it around yourself as you headed back to the sun room. You weren’t sure why but you had grown to love the room more and more each and every time you had visited. 

Crawling on top of the window sill you peaked out through the window as you watched the sun hide behind the horizon. Before you knew it became harder and harder to keep your eyes open and you slowly fell asleep, basking in the warmth of the afterglow in the diminished afternoon, alerting everyone it was now evening. 

\--

Illumi found himself frowning slightly when he noticed you weren’t in his room. It was long past dark and while yes he did arrive home rather late he did in fact expect you to be sleeping in your shared bed. Had he had known you weren’t in his room he would have immediately traveled to the sunroom; where you tended to isolate yourself much to his dismay. He let out an exhausted sigh as he marched over to the sun room and it was no surprise to him as he found you curled up in his comforter sleeping against the windowsill. He almost found it cute. 

He strode over to your sleeping form and examined your features in the faint moonlight. It was true to him and many others that you were quite beautiful. The raven haired man found himself cupping your cheek as he leaned his face closer and closer to yours as he gently pressed his lips against yours. Realizing what he was doing Illumi pulled back and furrowed his brows a bit. He didn’t know why he did that as there was nobody to witness his “act of love for his fiancee” nor were you awake to experience it since Illumi had been informed by his Father that it was proper to kiss you whenever he had the chance. Though the young assassin had to admit this felt more natural than his previous kiss with you. Which was strange to him and he couldn’t particularly figure out why. Pushing the thought out of his mind he gently picked you up bridal style with you still wrapped up comfortably in the blankets. 

Illumi carried you to his room and slowly laid you on the bed and began to slowly unravel the comforters from your thin body. He climbed into bed with you and pulled your body against his chest. Illumi closed his eyes and gently placed his head a top of yours. The young man took notice of how nice you smelled and oddly enough it pulled him into slumber far quicker than he was used to it. 

Illumi Zoldyck had never paid too much attention to anyone other than his siblings, specifically Killua. 

But there was just something about you he couldn’t exactly pin point that attracted him to you and he found himself paying more attention to you than was deemed necessary. 

And for reasons unknown he felt himself longing for you to look at him and pay attention to him as well.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the literal year of inactivity! We're back in business!

Illumi's eyes fluttered open and examined the lightening of the room in an attempt to indicate the time. He concluded it was still fairly early, some time during or before nine in the morning. Pushing that aside his gaze descended upon you. Had you been awake he was sure you would mistake it for something much more dangerous than pure curiosity. He was, after all, an elite assassin. And you were well aware of that fact.

Illumi frowned a bit at the thought that you may fear him. But why exactly did it irk him to think that? It wasn't as though it was safe to not fear him. Unable to find a reason he had decided to make sure you were not afraid of him, as to not only put a strain on the marriage but also so you wouldn't miscarry his child due to stress when you both consummated the marriage. He knew that wasn't wholly true but unable to find other reasoning he simply decided to settle with that until otherwise.

Suddenly he heard distant foot steps and he strained his ears as he concentrated on them. He quickly concluded they were heading to his room. His frown deepened when he was soon to be interrupted for whatever reason. Illumi looked down at you as he held you close to his chest in an almost protective manner. Hearing the footsteps coming closer he covered your ears with his hands, awaiting for the several butlers to barge in for God knows what reason.

Just as Illumi had predicted, two butlers barged into his room with a stern yet slightly anxious expression plastered across their faces.

"Master Illumi, Mistress Kikyou has arranged a meeting. Please come with me." The male butler's statement was rather monotonous. The other was a female butler stared straight at your unconscious body as Illumi held onto you. Illumi made a mental note that the man said "me" and not "us". Meaning the female butler was going to stay while he had to leave with you still resting in bed. He wasn't sure why but the thought alone irked him. Again, all these feelings of unknowing put the man on edge.

Letting out a sigh the assassin gently placed your unaware body back onto the softness of the mistress as he climbed out of the bed himself. Flipping his long hair over his shoulder, he began to walk alongside the butler that led him out of the room. Illumi watched the female butler approach the bed from the corner of his eye until he just decided to look forward as he walked behind the butler.

\--

You sprung up from the bed from hands suddenly shaking your body. Not fully alert you lazily look around the room until you spot a familiar face.

"Canary...?" You whisper as if to confirm that it was in fact the female butler. A slight smile tugged at the corner of her lips and she nodded, taking hold of your hand and pulling you out of bed.

"You have plans for today, my lady. Please come with me." She announced, delicately placing slippers upon your feet. You became slightly restless, unsure of what was in store for you. You swallowed hard and nodded. You walked with her out of the room, treading cautiously behind her.

"Erm...what exactly is going on today? Is it something important?" You asked hesitantly. Canary look back at you but continued walking as she said nothing for a brief moment.

"Everything that happens within the Zoldyck mansion is important, my lady," She began before stopping in front of two large doors. Opening them, you noticed what seemed like steam seeping from the room. Gently, Canary pushed you inside and closed the doors behind her. The room was rather large with an expansive bath with warm, crystal clear water inside. Due to the steam you could feel your white nightgown begin to cling to your body and you tried your best to ignore it as you turned to face the young butler. "But to answer your question fully: Yes, this is rather important. Mistress Kikyou had arranged a meeting with you and Master Illumi since it seems your interactions have been..." She paused for a moment in thought, "Minimal."

"O-Oh. I see..." You gulped nervously, having no idea you were even being watched by the lady of the manor. Canary stood still as she stared at you, almost as if she were expecting something. Seeing as you just stared blankly back she gestured towards the bath and back at you.

"My lady, please remove your clothing." The brown skinned girl requested. You felt your face grow hot at her request. Only your mother had ever seen you naked. But before you could object the girl turned her back to you in order to protect your modesty. You fidget awkwardly in your place as you eventually decide to take off your night gown and toss it into a nearby laundry basket.

Slowly, you make your descent into the pristine white bath tub. If you hadn't known better you would have mistaken it for a pool. You let out a pleasured sigh as the warm water relaxes your stiff muscles that were caused from your stay at the manor. You were worried about falling asleep but your nerves were calmed when you realized Canary would help you should anything happen. On the ledge, there lay a silver rack with various products. As if sensing your curiosity the butler speaks,

"Please use the products at your own discretion, my lady."

"Oh! Thank you." You turn to smile at her only to find that she still has her back turned. You find it noble she stays true to her word.

You take the bottles of the shampoo and conditioner and begin to wash your [H/L] [H/C] hair. The scented products smelled nice and appealed to your senses as your hair became enriched with suds. You massage your scalp before dunking your head under water, running your hand through the trusses of your hair as you try to rinse out the product.

After what feels like an hour you eventually climb out of the bath and to your surprise, Canary holds out a towel and a robe to you as she keeps her eyes closed, her long eyelashes kissing her under eyes. You smile and wrap the robe around you as you begin to towel off your wet hair.

"So, what's really going on?" You ask again, hopeful this time. "I know we don't interact a lot but it's only been a few days. What is to be expected of me?"

"Children are to be expected," She replies nonchalantly. You sputter as your entire face turns beat red, "That was a joke."

You blink a few times before letting a laugh as you nudge her teasingly, "Jeez, you scared me!"

"My apologies, my lady." She says despite a smile curling onto her lips, "Are you ready to get dressed?"

You nod, mentally preparing yourself for what your mother-in-law had planned for you.


End file.
